Top 5 Lessons That Pain Teaches You

Physical Pain is something that each of us undergo at some stage during our life. Many of us agonize over the pain that we undergo.   There is pain when we hurt ourself when we fall, hit ourself somewhere or from food poisoning, a surgery, a sprain, or a ligament tear. There are different kinds of physical pain : somatic, neuropathic, and visceral.

Have you ever asked or wondered as to how do you know when you sprain or twist a part of your body or when you have a tear of any tissue or  ligament or shoulder joint?

Do you take pain for granted?

For the first time, I realized after reading this article from the BBC, which appeared in July 2012, that there are people in this world who suffer from congenital analgesia.  Steven Pete and his brother were born with the rare genetic disorder congenital analgesia. They grew up – in Washington state, US – with a sense of touch but, as he explains in his own words, without ever feeling pain.

To suffer from physical pain is difficult and gets even more challenging for those whose tolerance level to bear the same may not be very high. Most of us moan and curse when we are in pain. Apart from all these pains is the emotional pain – pain in seeing our near and dear suffer, pain of regret, pain from having trusted someone who abused the trust.

Do you realize that pain can actually be a blessing ?

Physical pain warns you not to do something – for instance not walk with a ligament tear. Physical pain also enables you to determine an injury.

Emotional pain too can be a warning, for instance, to be careful of not trusting any person.

New brain scanning technologies are revealing that the part of the brain that processes physical pain also deals with emotional pain.

How can we use pain to grow, develop, to change and be human?

1. Caution – many times because of your carelessness or being preoccupied with something or being unconsciously incompetent or consciously competent leading to overconfidence, you meet with accidents or perform an exercise in an incorrect way. Physical pain is thus caused. However if you were more conscious or not lost in your thoughts, chances of accidents reduce.
2. Reduce regrets – you cannot control  every event in your life or for that matter influences in your life. What lies within your control is the meaning you attribute to each of these.  If you control the meaning or the impact of events in your life by creating as much value as you can, you will have a sense of purpose and personal power. Learn, unlearn and relearn from each regret and move forward.
3. Recognize emotional blind spots – most of us tend to focus on the possible causes of pain and vulnerability. Instead if you were to try to ask what each hurtful incident means to you and what you can do to heal and improve. Recognize the emotional blind spots not by engaging in a blame game, self-pity, self-criticism or avoiding the hurt feeling but by being compassionate and controlling your attitude towards the situation. Ask What am I feeling?  What does it mean to me?  What can I do to improve and heal?   Ask for help from friends, family if you think you need to share.
4. Thoughts – our thoughts control our feeling and our behavior.   Dale Carnegie was once asked what was the biggest lesson he had ever learned. He replied that, “By far, the most vital lesson I have ever learned is the importance of what we think.”   You see, Carnegie knew that our thoughts make us what we are—our mental attitude is the “X” factor that determines our fate. He quoted Emerson as having said, “A man is what he thinks about all day long…How could he possibly be anything else?”  Yes, if we think happy thoughts, we will be happy, if we think miserable thoughts, we will be miserable. If we think fear thoughts, we will be fearful. If we think sickly thoughts, we will probably be ill. If we think failure, we will certainly fail.  At the same time, Dale Carnegie knew that people couldn’t go around with a devil-may-care attitude about all their problems. Unfortunately, life isn’t so simple as all that. But he did advocate that we assume a positive attitude instead of a negative attitude. In other words, we need to be concerned about our problems, but not worried.  Our mind’s power to bring about change doesn’t stop with attitude, however. Remember…“Our life is what our thoughts make it.” Make yours strong, positive, and all it can be. For the full post click LINK
5. Emotional intelligence – self-awareness is a crucial step in overcoming emotional pain. Once you are aware you can acknowledge it.  When you become aware that you feel emotionally vulnerable, allow yourself time and space to investigate your feelings. Use the power of your words. Remember your words create your thoughts and align your energy in a specific direction. Emotional memory management enables us to manage our emotions in a way that will produce more positive outcomes. I like to think emotions as colors, some simple, and yet others are blends.

As a leader if you are emotionally vulnerable, your department and the organization as a whole will experience high turnover and absenteeism.

How have you dealt with pain?

What have been your takeaways from each occasion of pain ?