Little Things That Matter

Learn From The Past, Live The Present and Have An Open Mind to Face Tomorrow

  • Email
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • Home
  • About Lalita Raman
  • Connect With Me

You Snooze You Lose

6 May 2014 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

Photo Credits : Lalita Raman

“Use it or lose it.” That is what happens when you don’t use your muscles. And when you use such muscles after a long time, they are sore and when you have your next workout or a stretch or yoga you notice how misaligned you feel. You realize that there is more pain or imbalance on one side v/s your other side. Of course, we all have our dominant side, but when you do yoga or core exercises you see the stark difference between your left and right side. You choose to ignore this and when it becomes unbearable you decide to correct the poor alignment. You resolve to go regularly to yoga or stretch or in some cases to the chiropractor or to the physiotherapist.

What happens if you choose to continue to ignore ?

How often have we seen in organizations where executives spend too much time drafting, redrafting vision, mission and values statements. Over time they become ignorant or indifferent to poor alignment. They spend nowhere near enough time trying to align their organizations with the values and visions already in place- Jim Collins

If the people in a business or company are not aligned with the values and vision of the organization, you often see the majority of people pulling in a direction different from the overall vision, or scattered aimlessly. The organization as a result starts to fall apart. Values are such an integral part of who we are and if our behavior and actions are different from our inherent values, conflicts arise and we begin to suffer from the negative consequences. Sometimes the actions are different from values because of fear especially in cases of abuse or violence or though being a believer in being environment friendly you might not always buy organic food and so on.

When it comes to organizations how can you tell that the values are not in alignment? Values exist at each individuals’ level and if the organization has a high engagement level, with a deep level of trust, commitment and where employees are appreciated and recognized, and growth and progress of individuals and the organization is taking place, there is a high likelihood that the values are in alignment.

An organization which has all or some of the following attributes is seriously misaligned:

1.Lack of trust and faith among the team members within departments and across multi functions. No faith in senior management
2.Customer complaints and dissatisfaction is high.
3.Culture is one of criticize, condemn and complain. There is no appreciation or constructive feedback given to the employees at any level.
4.Command and control style of management. Information is not shared.
5.There is resentment, cynicism, blame and subversion
6.Profits and revenues are lagging those of competitors and on a downward spiral.
7.Turnover is high and engagement levels are low to abysmally low
8.Constant fire-fighting instead of progress and development
9.Costs are high and yet no new innovations or product lines are being introduced
10.People within the organization feel like a cog in the wheel and most have checked out mentally.

These are the warning signals and an organization which sees an increase in any or all the above aspects needs to look into what is going wrong? Working in line with the values is a daily process and starts from the time the vision is laid out, people are recruited to the firm and continues on an ongoing basis by reflecting on what is going well and what needs to improve and asking questions and listening to what the employees of the company have to say.

How to Understand People’s Workplace Values

1.Have a recruitment process where you find talent that is best in line with the organization values.
2.Identify such talent by asking focused questions at the interview stage. Get to know the person, their action and behaviors in different aspects of their role in an organization and in their life.
3.Look at their past work history. What were their attitudes with regard to matters of conflict or where they were in disagreement?
4.Get to know people, develop a positive attitude.
5. Where essential, do psychometric tests.

As leaders, listen, observe, communicate, appreciate and give positive feedback. Click To Tweet

Let your behavior as a leader be inspiring and worth modeling and let it show your values. Click To Tweet.

Link participation in the adoption of values and the behaviors and actions needed. Reflect, celebrate wins of your team and praise every improvement and give people a fine reputation to live up to. Click To Tweet.

Understand what influences the values of your team and how if at all they are developing and changing over time. Is this change healthy or for the worse?

How do you lead with passion and in alignment with your values?

For Coaching, Speaking or Training let’s connect.

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Attitude, Character, Communication, Employee Engagement, Integrity, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life Tagged With: alignment, engagement, Jim Collins, leadfromwithin, progress and development, trust.faith, Values., Vision

How Committed Are You To Your Word?

19 August 2013 By Lalita Raman 2 Comments

Lalita Raman

Lalita Raman

“I’ll get that done by tomorrow morning.”

“Just leave it to me, I’ll help you get that website of yours up and running by the end of this weekend.”

“Hey, you’ve often said that you and I should collaborate together on a topic of common interest where we can work together. You have been interested in leadership workshops and speaking sessions. How about we collaborate on that and see how it goes? Are you interested? You always say that you are interested and then despite several follow ups’ from me, you don’t revert on how we can proceed together. You make statements on how we should think about working together and yet there is zero follow through!”

How many times have you been in one of the above situations where your friends or business partners or acquaintances commit in words to do something yet there is no follow through action?

Our desires dictates our priorities which in turn shape our choices. Our choices in turn determine our actions. Thoughts translate into feeling, feeling to words and/or action, actions become habit, and habits crystallize into character. The formation of a good character, therefore, is largely dependent upon the right unfolding of thoughts and feelings. A person whose thoughts, audio and video is in sync is known to be one who walks their talk. However, is it imperative that every spoken word be translated to action?

“Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.” ― Mark Twain

When is action warranted? I would say almost always. If your word is who you are, having the commitment to follow through and the courage to take the kind of bold action that creates new opportunities is, possibly, one of the most critical skills a leader can have. Every time you commit with your word and don’t honor it with your action, you reveal your character. Do you want to create a relationship of trust and show that you are responsible for your words and actions ?

When is action not necessary ?

-> If you have not been diligent in the way you use your words, possibly in situations of anger and emotional outbursts, follow through action may not be necessary.

-> when you have been boastful of things that you are not capable of or when you had no intention to keep up your words, action is unlikely to follow. The words are not indicative of your authentic self.

Every time this happens, ask yourself:

♠”What am I doing right now that is a powerful and meaningful use of this moment?”
♠”Am I acting responsibility and am I being authentic to myself and in the way I am relating to others?”
♠”Am I avoiding commitments habitually? What am I doing to get out of my comfort zone?”
♠”What changes do I need to bring about to cause a shift in my behavior?”

→Lying to others is bad enough but the worst lies are those we tell ourselves.←

♣Life is a journey of challenges and opportunities and one in which we need to relate and make a connection with others. The choice is yours to make.♣

†Are you willing to keep an open mind, open heart, and be aware about your thoughts, feelings, words and actions?
†Do your words matter?
†Are you ready to take the step forward of being committed and live with integrity?
†Do you have the inclination and thus make the time and effort to keep your word?

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Character, Communication, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life Tagged With: Commitment, Leadership, leadfromwithin, Mark Twain, Time, Values., walk your talk

On This Father’s Day, a small note of “Thank you”

16 June 2013 By Lalita Raman 4 Comments

Lalita Raman

Lalita Raman

I’ve had the great fortune of growing up with a friend, a mentor who is none else than my Dad. My dad is special to me and my appreciation of him has grown over the years. There is not a moment, I hesitate to share what I have to say with my dad and I think this has been possible only because of the space he has always given in our relationship.

He has always lived his values of integrity, discipline, hard work, empathy and love. He has always encouraged my sister and I to be independent, follow our dreams and to believe in ourself.

Life lessons I have learnt from my dad

1.You are your word and always honor your word.
2.If in doubt, ask questions. Communicate and clarify even in situations of conflict.
3.No matter how bad the situation may be, there is a learning from each of those.
4.Treat people with respect and love.
5.Learn, unlearn, relearn and share.
6.Your inner conscience is your guide and to take the journey within is something I have learnt from my parents.
7.Emotions is an essential part of my life and I need to be emotionally aware and express myself.
8. I have grown up in an environment of healthy discussions, debates and analysis be it of books, movies, TV shows or an incident in our daily lives.
9. Family is very important and always make time for your family.
10. Never be in debt and never borrow.
11. I have the power of choice and I have to face the music of my choices.
12. To live within my means and that my behavior and actions needs to reflect my values.
13. To be ambitious but in chasing my dreams and passion, I should not forget to be gratuitous.
14. To be confident of myself, proud of my achievements but never to un-friend humility.
15. To derive strength in every challenge that I face in life and to be an optimist.

My dad has always loved, cared and looked out for me. He has always understood me, listened, empathized and no amount of words will ever be able to articulate the wonderful Dad that I have.

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life Tagged With: conscience, Dad, dreams. Passion, emotions, family, Father's Day, Gratuitous, integrity, lead from within, life, thank you, Values.

Values Are Like Fingerprints… Are You Leading With Your Values?

5 June 2013 By Lalita Raman 5 Comments

Lalita Raman

Lalita Raman

It is Friday evening and you are looking forward to your long overdue vacation. You are working on the final touches of your proposal to get a new line of business approved. The proposal is almost ready barring some details on some legal challenges that you are awaiting from your legal department. You receive the legal opinion and when you read it, you realize that a key element is missing. Not considering this aspect might hurt the franchise of the business in the future. The only person aware about this is you and none else.
What would you do?
Would you rather let it go because you’ll never be found out or blamed or would you listen to your inner voice which tells you how important it is to highlight this specific legal risk.

What is this inner voice that whispers to you at various moments in your day and life. A whisper to the effect “There is no way you can do that. it’s not right”.

Each of us have core values whether we realize it or not. Core values is what is imbibed in us from the day we are born. Some values we instill in us as we are growing. Values sit within our memory and are deep-rooted. They are not written anywhere but are those which we live through our behavior and actions.

Values are like fingerprints. Nobody’s are the same, but you leave ‘em all over everything you do. ~Elvis Presley

You are your personal brand. Personal brand is not just about you being a CEO or CFO or Fashion designer but it is what you are in what you do and how you choose to show your values in your career and the various roles you perform.

Key questions on Values – For the full post refer LINK

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Character, Coaching, Communication, Integrity, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development Tagged With: Actions, behavior, Business, coaching, Elvis Presley, lead from within, Leadership, People, personal branding, Values.

The Power Of “MINDFULNESS”

9 December 2012 By Lalita Raman 4 Comments

You must have had manic days where you have no time to drink water or take a deep breadth, when you have a million things to do and yet get pulled in different directions.  Some of the moments on these days can be those of elation, anger, sadness, exasperation, exuberance and sheer exhaustion.

Life throws many a challenge and it is entirely up to each of us on the choices we make. In today’s rat race, we forget many times that success linked to external factors creates a vacuum and our soul is restless.

With all the pressures we face in our day-to-day lives, we find it difficult to find the right equilibrium between our short-term financial goals and long-term calling.  Many of us become human doers rather than a human being.

Many of you have heard of mindfulness and probably practice it.  What is mindfulness? Is there some magic formula? Does one have to attain the state of nirvana? Is it about sitting in meditation on a daily basis?

Key to mindfulness is be aware and conscious of what you are doing and give your fullest to that moment in heart and soul.  If you can stay grounded and authentic, face new challenges daringly and with humility and be at peace with the present, that is mindfulness.

10 Keys To Mindfulness

  1. Is it just about sitting in a corner and meditating I think not. It is anything you choose to do with clarity and a deeper understanding. It is about being present in whatever you are doing and being aware of your presence and ways every action of yours would impact others.
  2. Being conscious of your values no matter what you do, you lead with your values and from your inner self.
  3. Are you giving the attention of your time ? Give your full focus in whatever you are doing be it working out, having a dialogue with somebody, or listening to someone.  Staying focused without allowing your thoughts to wander.
  4. What is my inner talk ? to journal and reflect on one’s day while walking or hiking or even whilst just being, enables clarity.
  5. Am I whole-hearted about in every thing I do? being involved in mind, body and soul in whatever we are engaged in at that moment in time? The ability to give our whole and undivided attention to those that I care about.
  6. Can I go on a journey inside ? Ability to be silent and quiet in the frenetic lives that most of us lead. To be comfortable with the silence within you where there is serenity and nothing awkward or nothing to fight or argue about. A place where your mind is at rest and you are comfortable with the silence and the solitude and one that gives you clarity and peace.
  7. Am I Being in the now to me this does not mean forgetting the past. I look at it as using experiences in the past and leveraging on the strength that it has given me to deal with the now. We are what we are today as a result of our life experiences and we should take a leaf of every experience that has made us who we are today and leverage of it to deal with what life has to offer us.
  8. Am I planting a seed for my future  every moment is a choice and each of these choices paves the next moment and several such moments in our journey of life.
  9. Am I human ? In that I am grateful for what I have, gratuitous to others, realistically optimistic, not do unto others what I would not to self
  10. Am I courageous and willing to try? Belief in self and not have the inner critique and fears pull me down.

Various studies and research have shown that mindfulness meditation significantly improves the effects on brain and immune function. It has positive effects on physical health, emotional control, sleep control, coping styles, anxiety and concentration.

Research and studies have also shown that we’re often happiest when we’re lost in “The Moment”. The more we allow our mind to wander and control us the more lost we are and chances of being less happy.

There is always peace and serenity within us and it is only a matter of finding it in our solace.

References

LINK 1

LINK 2

LINK 3

Image Source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Character, Coaching, Habits, Health, Lead From Within, Life Tagged With: coaching, courage, fear, future, Human, inner-self, journey, Life Coaching, meditation, mindfulness, self, Values.

What Makes You Come Alive?

30 September 2012 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

“The purpose of life is a life of purpose.” ― Robert Bryne

Life has a different meaning to each of us & in the many earth shattering moments that life presents us, some of us look for our calling. I believe that no matter how big or small, each of us, are driven by a purpose.

One of my friends had come to visit me a week back and we were catching up on family, events and life. She asked me how my parents were doing and I mentioned to her that my mom was not keeping too well. Her mom wasn’t keeping too well either. Each of us remarked that age adds its own share of twists and turns to life.

But then, I got thinking and told her, you know, what saddens me the most is that I feel that my mom has lost the drive, the sense of need to fight back. Of course her health has been challenging, but many times I feel she perhaps feels that she has lost the ‘Purpose’. My friend listening to my remark and my description of the various aspects of how my mom was, nodded in agreement.

Purpose in life is what leads us. This passion could be varied from bringing up children, serving and helping the needy, becoming one of the world’s richest entrepreneur, winning an Olympic medal, to looking after your family and home.

For each of us who are committed in doing what gives us joy, with sudden challenges like health issues, accidents or any other calamity, some of us feel cut off from our purpose. We feel there is no driving energy for our life.

My mom had a busy life and took joy in bringing up her two daughters, looking after her husband and her home. She made sure that the home was a temple filled with love, values and warmth. She worked hard for this and achieved this day in and day out. In the past few years on the advise of her doctor she is not allowed to do any household chores. May be, she feels that an important part of her life was taken away from her.

You may ask why don’t I ask her or talk to her. I have and continue to do so. She of course denies but I just sense a feeling of loss from her eye expressions and I feel sad.

We all live for a purpose and despite what life throws at us, somehow we need to get ourselves to change course without losing hope and momentum.  This is something that has to come from within. Hope is not something we can deny ourselves nor others. I don’t believe in giving false hope. You need to face reality but you should not lose enthusiasm nor lose the drive.

I constantly derive a lot of inspiration from my parents, my sister and from the various life stories of people that I meet or read or hear about.

One person who comes to my mind is Christopher Reeve.  Despite his paralysis, Reeve was determined to be financially self-sufficient. Less than a year after his injury, Reeve began to accept invitations for speaking engagements. He through his actions showed each of us that there can be life even after a serious injury and one should never give up.

Purpose in life is something each of us can associate with but sometimes we have to change paths to achieve our dreams or vision.

“There is a fire inside, Sit down beside it. Watch the flames, the ancient, flickering dance of yourself.” John MacEnulty

Image Source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Emotions, Life Tagged With: Christopher Reeve, dreams, hope, lead from within, life, Love, mom, passion, purpose, Values.

How To Take Charge Of Your Personal Growth : 10 Essentials

6 August 2012 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

“We want a world where life is preserved, and the quality of life is enriched for everybody, not only for the privileged.” ~ Isabel Allende

Personal Growth is one which I find it difficult to define because it encompasses a lot of things. When we are born, most of us are given a suitcase full of standards, acceptable behavior, things to learn,values & a whole load of do’s and don’ts. As we grow and progress in life we keep adding or throwing away some contents of this suitcase. Each of us thus become a product of the choices we have made or that we have consciously decided not to make.

How many times in your day-to-day life have you been told right from childhood, ” you can’t do this” or “you need to follow this”, or “the deadline for this project is 20 days from now”, “you need to get married by 25” or as a woman you hear “you need to behave lady like” or something similar.

We may choose to follow some of these instructions, advise or suggestions and yet others we ignore because we feel it is just gender stereotyping. However respect, being ethical and being human is something I would like to think that most of us are ingrained with while growing up. This value is further enhanced when we observe our parents, and the behavior of our community in which we socialize.

In today’s day and age I find many who have lost the basic etiquette of courtesy, and being polite.  Take the case of social media where you try to make new connections and most people love to get more and more followers. Whilst it is good to make new connections, I find it strange and disrespectful when some of them don’t even bother to acknowledge you when you RT them or react to something on their timeline (I’m not referring to trolls here). Why are we so keen to make new connections and being part of every form of social media when we can’t spend quality time on existing relationships, we don’t have time to acknowledge and ask how one is doing?

There are many who don’t give importance to loyalty and commitment to their word. People speak about change but refuse to change themselves and yet others who insult and abuse in the name of religion and ethics.

Isn’t Personal Growth about

  1. Achieving more love, belonging, better communication skills and relationships
  2. Accessing greater understanding and wisdom
  3. Aligning, anchoring and actualizing your goals
  4. Awakening the inner voice.
  5. Being a better communicator and listener and to relate to others feelings.
  6. Becoming an instrument of transformation for others
  7. Breaking through barriers, fears and limitations that hold you back. Learning how to create what you want
  8. Changing for the better. Maintain clarity and focus. Make shifts and change more quickly, with less pain. Draw out your own personal pathway to success. Know where you want to go. Know who you are and what you stand for
  9. Measuring, tracking and improving what is important
  10. Developing more self-trust and self-reliance.

Life is a journey where each of us face obstacles in pursuing goals, or in just living.   Some of us get overwhelmed with some of these hurdles and yet some of us work through these challenges and grow stronger. But isn’t life about learning, developing, growing and moving on to take new pursuits and face new challenges?

To me, personal growth is having integrity and being human.  Biggest value that any of us need to have and remember is to Be Human.   We are always one decision, one word, one reaction away from damaging what has taken us years to develop so don’t you think we need to be careful of our words and actions?

Image Source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Leadership & Personal Development, Life, Relationships, Social Media Tagged With: childhood, communicatiom, courtesy, Empathy, Facebook, Human, lead from within, personal growth, Social Media, Twitter, Values.

Coach: Why You Must Hire One AND Top 12 Questions to Ask

10 July 2012 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

With the information overload that we have on a daily basis from Social Media, and the Internet, many times you find it difficult to get to where you want to go.

Let’s say you are a top performing executive in an organization and have consistently surpassed your targets. You have never shirked responsibility nor have you disappointed in your commitments. However, you feel you are reaching a saturation point and are not able to grow. You speak to your boss and he tells you to enroll in a leadership and motivational course. He also sends you some web links to read. You attend the course for 2 days, you read all the links he sent you and add some of them to your other regular reading sources.

Yet, you feel that you are not able to make the progress you want to make. You have tried to tell this again to your boss, Human Resources and other seniors within the organization but to no avail. You don’t want to leave the company but sometimes you feel that is probably the best option available.

On line, group trainings will not be able to help you in your transition because they are not tailor-made to address your individual roadblocks. Most leadership programs are too general to provide opportunities for intensive personalized work.

A Coach is someone who can help you. No, the person doesn’t need to be in your field of expertise.

Coaching is a process to unlock a person’s potential to maximize their own performance. It is essentially a conversation, a dialogue between the coach and the client which focuses on improvement of skills and concrete results.

Steps to take before you hire a coach and the questions to ask…

For the full post click on this LINK

Image Source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Coaching Tagged With: Change, Coach, coaching, Executive, Leadership, Organizational Development, responsibility, Training, Trust, Values.

Recent Posts

  • A Tribute to a Courageous and Strong Woman….My Mother.
  • 6 Fences To Build For Yourself
  • Little Things That Matter In Life.
  • 6 Antidotes To Apathy
  • What Does It Take To “Lead By Example”?

Subscribe to my Blog

Co-Author of An Inspiring Book

Transitions, Lalita Raman

Buy Now

Transitions, Lalita Raman

VISIT MY WEBSITE

Categories

  • Animals
  • Attitude
  • Brand You
  • Character
  • Coaching
  • Communication
  • Culture
  • Customer Service and Sales
  • Discrimination
  • Emotions
  • Employee Engagement
  • Energise Your Leadership
  • Energize Your Leadership
  • Entrepreneur
  • Environment and Nature
  • Generalizations
  • Habits
  • Health
  • Hike
  • Idiosyncracies
  • India
  • Integrity
  • Lead By Example
  • Lead From Within
  • Leadership & Personal Development
  • Life
  • Meditation
  • Mindfulness
  • Mobile Phone
  • My favorite songs
  • Pakistan
  • Relationships
  • Resilience
  • Sales Leadership
  • self-awareness
  • Social Media
  • Songs
  • Speech
  • Talent And Human Resources
  • Travel
  • Treks
  • Uncategorized
  • Video
  • Video Blogs
  • Violence Against Women
  • Woman
  • Women
  • Youth

Tags

Anger Appreciation attitude behavior Business Change coaching Commitment Communication courage EI emotions Empathy fear Gratitude Health hope Human humility India judgement lead by example Leader Leadership leadfromwithin lead from within life listen Listening Love mindfulness Nature negativity Pema Chodron positive Questions respect Self-Awareness smile Social Media thank you Twitter Values. Women You Matter

Follow me on Twitter

My Tweets

Archives

  • February 2020
  • January 2017
  • November 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • September 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010

[footer_backtotop]

Copyright © 2007–2025 Lalita Raman, Transitions Intl Limited

%d