Little Things That Matter

Learn From The Past, Live The Present and Have An Open Mind to Face Tomorrow

  • Email
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • Home
  • About Lalita Raman
  • Connect With Me

Five Keys To Leadership Excellence

27 January 2016 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

The weather this past weekend was cold in some parts of the world and bitterly freezing in other parts. Most people when asked, how are you, were replying “it is cold”. The cold season shall pass and then we will slowly come to the peak of summer with temperatures in some parts of the world going up to 50°C or more. Extreme cold or heat is not something most of us are comfortable with.

Moderate weather, like fall or spring, is what most of us can bear and are comfortable with.

→How are you adopting moderation in your life?

#Moderation, not mediocrity, is something that will help you move forward. #transitions #leadership.

Click To Tweet

#Moderation in moving towards excellence is key to #influencing others #positively.#transitions

Click To Tweet

→Are you being mediocre or moderate in who you are?

→What kind of environment are you creating around you?

→Are you expecting people to work in a manner that burns them out?

Moderation is key to leadership excellence – How does moderation help you to succeed?

1.Communicate

We live in a world of Communication and Volatile behavior of being too excited, too angry, too sad will show up in the way you communicate. If your thoughts are not emotionally balanced, then your words will be affected. Our words do not just give information, they influence how people connect with us and see us.

#Moderation in your thoughts helps the way you communicate and reframe your #communication.

Click To Tweet

2.Connect

We are social animals and connection with others is how we thrive. We need to learn from our mistakes. As a leader what are your behaviors and actions? Does it connect or isolate? Extreme enthusiasm, passion or apathy does not create trust or a foundation for long-term relationships. Seek to connect with genuine interest in the other person.

3.Appreciate

Silent gratitude is no good. Learn to appreciate and recognize your team’s effort and what they have done well. Don’t indulge in flattery but give honest and sincere appreciation.

4.Compassion

Connect and care with your compassion and not by being a task master. Your compassion will enable you to listen, observe and learn about your team.

5.Emotional Intelligence

What emotions come up for you in different situations?  How do you manage them, in being a role model? Be aware of your emotions and recognize them and do not be a victim of your primitive brain causing an amygdala hijack. Stop second guessing every decision you make and agonizing over whether you made the right one or not. Whilst reflection is necessary, having doubts over every decision affects your EI and leadership. Trust your intuition, reflect on what went well and what can be done to improver. Overall trust yourself and have the EI to be moderate in your behaviors and actions to self and others.

#Leadership is not about mediocrity and accepting status quo, but the ability to #inspire others.

Click To Tweet

Moderation in all walks of life gives clarity and balance, why would you deny yourself that ?

Transitions in life puts us through challenges and moderation is key to go through such transitions to grow and develop. Please consult me if you are looking for one-on-one coaching, training, group coaching or to speak on motivational topics.

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Attitude, Brand You, Character, Coaching, Communication, Customer Service and Sales, Emotions, Integrity, Lead By Example, Leadership & Personal Development, Resilience, Sales Leadership, self-awareness, Talent And Human Resources Tagged With: EI, emotions, EQ, lead by example, Leadership, leadfromwithin, life, moderation, Motivation, Transitions

Five Steps To Empower Your Way To Resilience

16 November 2015 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

Last Thursday, my mom had a bad fall. She slipped in the bathroom and badly injured her shoulder, her shoulder cervical area, and her pelvic bone. Initial X-ray, that day, did not reveal any fracture. My mother suffers from Parkinson and Osteoporosis for the past five years. Despite being in pain and agony, she hobbled her way through and still woke up at her usual time at 4 am on Friday. Her pain increased over the weekend and the pain killers seemed to have limited effect. and when she was taken to the hospital on Monday, she was diagnosed with multiple fractures. She has been advised complete bed rest. Yet, with her determination and willpower and my sister’s and dad’s help, she came back home. She made a deal with her Doctor that she will take care and come back on Friday, because the next two days is Diwali, which is our New Year. She did not want to be in the hospital for the next three days.

My mother is a resilient woman. Despite her Parkinson’s and Osteoporosis deteriorating over the years, she is mentally strong, very resilient and with her willpower she bounces back and continues with her life as it unfolds, with her positive attitude.

When you choose to wallow in your mishaps, sorrows or unpleasant changes that come along, you will increase the stress and overwhelm in your life.


Resilience is necessary for each of us because it with our resilient attitude that we face challenges, stay committed, and are able to move forward.

How do you build your resilience ?

1. Set an intention

One of my yoga instructors begins her class by asking us to set an intention and be conscious of that intention through some of the poses that we may find challenging. Setting an intention helps us to focus and direct our effort towards that.

Setting an intention on a daily basis is a gentle reminder to ourselves of what we want to be or achieve at the end of the day. The journey to that intention or goal despite challenges becomes more purposeful.

2. Adopt a positive mindset

A negative mindset leads to negative emotions and the vicious cycle continues. Emotions are present in our daily lives and plays a role in how we behave individually and socially. The limbic system controls our emotions and other brain functions related to our instincts and memories. When our brain perceives a threat or faces a threat or adversity, our brain gets into a fight, flight or freeze mode.

How many times have you been in situations when you sent an email and regretted over it? That is your limbic system in action where essentially your motor skills are in full form and your executive center or the rational part of your brain shuts down.

With a #Positive mind, we allow our #brain to think rationally. #transitions #resilient

Click To Tweet

4.Labeling your emotion

We are emotional beings and EI does not mean keeping our emotions pent-up. Be aware of your emotions and what I have found useful is to label my emotions. For e.g. If someone does not respond to an email within the time frame they had committed, I’m either frustrated, angry or resign to the fact that the person is not committed. When I label my emotion, I recognize it and it becomes easier to deal with it. The trick here is to be aware of your emotion, recognize it and instinctively label it without over analyzing and spending too much time.

If you over analyze it, you run the risk of tiring your brain and overwhelming yourself.

5.Reflect

It is easy to blame yourself and criticise. Stop. Resilience is about your ability to take it all in, recognize where you are and move on without losing heart. Learn to reflect on what went well even in those challenging circumstances, what could you do differently to overcome the situation you are in. Tell yourself, “I am going to overcome this situation” or ” I can do it” and march forward.

The way you speak to yourself i.e. your thoughts, can either help you build yourself or chip away at your ability to feel confident. What will you choose?

Make those whispers to yourself #empowering, empathetic and one that builds your inner #strength.

Click To Tweet

Resilience is a continuous process and not restricted to being adept at navigating hurdles and high pressure situations in life. It is about a mindset that helps you thrive through every situation, no matter what they are. Resilience is not about facing every aspect of life on your own. Take the support of friends and family because in confiding and collaborating with others whom you trust, you are able to get insights and breakthroughs.

Change is part of our lives and with some changes, transition takes a longer time and affects our daily being and activity. To lead your life with passion and purpose and overcome and face the transitions in your life and thrive, Contact me for one-on-one coaching, or group coaching or workshops or facilitation. 

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Attitude, Character, Coaching, Emotions, Energize Your Leadership, Habits, Health, Integrity, Lead By Example, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life, Mindfulness, Resilience, self-awareness Tagged With: coaching, Communication, EI, emotions, EQ, judgement, lead from within, Leadership, positive, reflect, Resilience

9 Certain Ways To Deal With Difficult Conversations

8 May 2015 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

“I get tense and don’t look forward to the conversation I am going to have with my boss. She doesn’t seem to listen and I feel my tongue is tied and I leave the conversation or meeting with a lot of pent-up feelings and emotions.” This was one of my clients expressing her frustration in managing conversations with her boss.

Have you been in situations where you need to tell somebody something and yet don’t wish to spoil the relationship? Difficult conversations are not something most of us look forward to and yet they are part of our life.

I was in the midst of a difficult conversation with a colleague of mine, two weeks back. The first conversation didn’t go too well, with him doing all the talking and telling. I was cautious and at the end of the conversation realized that I had not expressed myself in the way I wanted to.

I had let my emotions take the better of me and did not permit my rational brain to have a clear, concise and assertive conversation. After the meeting, I asked myself several questions and I practiced on myself the same questions I ask of my clients whilst coaching them.

Tips To Deal With Difficult Conversations

1. Be present

This is crucial and I started off with this point because this is what helped me in my follow-up conversation with my colleague. Being present is essential to listen, to observe, to ask questions and be emotionally connected. It is easy to be lost in your own thoughts and rushing to say what you have to say especially if your brain is telling you to do it and you could not express yourself in your first conversation or past conversations with this person. I had listened to my colleague and yet I guess there was something in me that was not present and maybe I was so lost in my thoughts that I did not express myself or ask the right questions and allowed my judgment to color my thoughts.

We make observations and impressions about people and sometimes these become assertions. And we turn these assertions into facts. We may have formed an opinion about a person based on our past experience and we tend to make that as an assertion and convince ourselves that they are whom we assert them to be.

My colleague was doing this in our first conversation and instead of empathetically listening to him, I let my emotions take the better of me. Being present means to listen in mind-body and soul and adapt to the conversation that is happening between you and the other person instead of what is happening within your head. Cut out all forms of distraction and give your undivided attention.

2. Deal with emotions

We are emotional beings and some conversations trigger emotions in us and the other party. This is one of the most important reasons, why we don’t like to engage in difficult conversations. The way to deal with emotions, either in yourself or in the other person, is to name them: ‘I see you’re mad about that’ or ‘I feel sad about what happened’. When you call out emotions like that, you acknowledge it and facilitate an environment to talk about them. This is way better than getting lost in the destruction of the wave of emotion. To cool down your own emotion and not allow that to hijack the conversation, you may want to drink water or take a break in a manner that is most appropriate to that situation.

3.Think before you speak

Being aware about ours and others emotions not only helps us to recognise the emotions but also think before we speak. Think about why we think the way we think. This helps in situations where you may not be prepared or where you are prepared and the conversation may not be going along the path you expected. Asking the right questions also helps you to think and get more data to support your point of view.

4.Avoid words like But and However

Many conversations in our daily life starts with I appreciate your point of view ‘BUT’. I used to do this too and now I have become aware and consciously avoid using them even in daily conversations that may not be difficult. Words like ‘But’ and ‘However’, nullify what has been expressed before. Use ‘And’ instead. By using ‘ And’, you recognize that there could be another point of view and perspective. When you use ‘And’, you are indicating an inclusive stance, instead of using words which express that you are the only one that’s right.

5.Remind yourself of the ‘Why’

Setting yourself an intention before going into any conversation helps and if somebody catches you unawares, then during the conversation think of the Why. 

What is your #intention and why are you choosing to say what you say or not say? #leadfromwithin

Click To Tweet

6.Respect

How you say, what you say is equally important.

The #words you choose and the #tone you use are equally important #communication #EI

Click To Tweet

The nicest words will not land well if your tone and body language does not indicate the genuineness of what you are saying.

7.Clarify

We may be interpreting something based on our bias and the fact is we are all biased. We don’t need to run away with our bias to make interpretations which may exemplify the conflict. Clarify and ask questions. Clarify by paraphrasing and this allows you to check your understanding and show the person that you are listening.

8.Follow-Up

To ignore is easy. We are human and like to be paid importance to. Check-in with the person the day after or within a reasonable period of time. And if you felt that a proper closure did not happen in your last conversation, do it again if necessary.

9.Trust Your Gut

Your instinct and intuition is your best guide and go by it, If you feel you need to have another conversation, call on the person and say, “I feel we didn’t end on a good note” or “I feel I didn’t get a chance to express my point of view”. “Would you be open to sparing a few minutes, so that I can explain it better”?

My follow-up conversation with my colleague was smoother and both of us expressed what we had to say and we are still communicating and our relationship has got better for sure.

Our brain’s main function is to keep us alive and the one overriding basic principle of the brain’s operation is that all brains are constantly on the lookout for threat – and will continuously move ‘away’ from anything perceived as a threat and ‘toward’ anything perceived as a reward. This is our basic survival mechanism. Manage your brain and don’t cut yourself short by dreading difficult conversations.

The above are some tips. How do YOU deal with ‘Difficult Conversations’?

I work with clients to enhance their communication, self-confidence and in turn their executive presence. If you want to learn more please feel to connect with me.

image source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Attitude, Character, Coaching, Communication, Emotions, Energize Your Leadership, Habits, Lead By Example, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life Tagged With: And, But, Communication, Difficult conversations, emotions, lead by example, leadfromwithin

5 Sure Ways To Manage Procrastination

29 April 2015 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

Source : National Geographic

As an entrepreneur and freelance consultant, I envision and strive to connect with my clients and grow my business and reach.

Growing my business and its reach is also a challenge, I need to face and overcome on a daily basis, and on some days I tend to procrastinate on better or improved ways to do it. I ask myself as to where I can grow and do better and thus push myself beyond my comfort zone.

Whilst I enjoy coaching, facilitating, speaking and designing workshops and preparing content for it, there are other activities that I usually tend to put away. Activities such as networking, finding clients who will benefit from coaching, writing my book (work in process), though I enjoy, I tend to push it away to either a later time or even worse, to a later day.

I think this happens because many times, my brain doesn’t see the immediate reward and thus it triggers various emotions such as self-criticizing, judgment, frustration and self-doubt.

Many clients whom I coach face a common barrier in time management and procrastination. Their barriers could result from lack of motivation, being a victim to  “The Tyranny of the Urgent”, or not being committed to what they want to achieve.

⇒How do you motivate yourself to take that next step?
⇒What can you do to manage your time in a day better?
⇒What are some of the reasons for not feeling a sense of urgency to accomplish a goal?
⇒How driven are you by your list of things to do? Are you able to see the link between what you need to do in order to get what you want?
⇒How are you managing your conflicting emotions and thus your brain to move forward and not procrastinate?

What strategies can you use to give you that adrenalin to “Just Do It”?

 

1. Use of words

What words are you using with respect to the activity that you are procrastinating on?

Is it necessity words like should be/do, must do, have to do, ought to, Or
probability words like could do, can do, may do, I will try, I might be able to Or
possibility words like I want to, I love to, I like to, will do

2. Feelings

Once you have Identified the words you use to activities which you tend to drag your feet on, ask yourself what feelings do those words generate in you? What emotions do those feelings generate? What do you do with those emotions? Do you get into a critical mood or a self-pity mode? How is that helping you? Acknowledge your feelings and emotions and what are some of the ways you can best manage that.

3. The Past

On activities that you have procrastinated on, in the past, what changed for you to get it done? How did you motivate yourself? What words did you use? Did you seek guidance or advise from a friend or mentor?

4. The “Why”

Ask yourself what is the purpose of what you are doing? Linking to the why I do what I do helps me to continue my journey towards achieving my goal and vision though I may not be necessarily motivated with each and every aspect of that path. 

Reminding myself of “The Why” keeps me focused and gives me the #clarity and sense of direction.

Click To Tweet

 

5. Manage

We are emotional beings and it is not possible to live without emotions nor suppress them. What we can do is to manage our emotions. Find the why, small rewards that keeps me going, taking a break, asking what is in that activity that triggers the emotions are some of the ways I find it useful to manage my procrastination. Writing down your ideal day and your day as is will help you identify the gaps and help you overcome them. Whose help or what resources do you need to give you that boost to move forward?

6. Mindfulness

We think we multitask. Science has proved that our brains cannot multi task. Two activities that require us to use our executive center of the brain, The Pre-Frontal Cortex, cannot be done at the same time. When we engage in multitasking, we overwhelm our brain and that results in lack of focus and thus in not delivering the desired results.

#Mindfulness is a great way to bring focus back to our task in hand #leadfromwithin

Click To Tweet

What strategies have you adopted to get over procrastination?
How do you motivate yourself to do the tasks which are necessary but you may not be excited about?

Let’s connect to continue the conversation.

Co Author of the Book “Energize Your Leadership”  Buy Now

.

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Attitude, Coaching, Communication, Emotions, Energize Your Leadership, Lead By Example, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life, Meditation, Mindfulness Tagged With: clarity, coaching, EI, emotions, Leadership, mindfulness, motivate, prefrontal cortex, Procrastinate, purpose

How To Control Your Mind?

5 March 2015 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

Attachment-1 (7)

I had to wake up at 4:30 am, on Wednesday, for an early morning call, and I was dreading it on Tuesday. I don’t sleep until late and thus waking up that early in the morning is not my cup of tea. I was working on some deadlines on Tuesday and throughout the evening, I was frustrated that these on-line webinars almost always suited the U.S. time zone, despite international participation.

My mind was brooding on this so much, that I became stressed. This continued on for probably a little over 2 hours. I suddenly realized that I was unable to focus my attention on what I was doing. and I hadn’t done much. I had to snap out of this.

The timing of the early morning call was not something I could choose. What I can choose is my state of mind and how I appear at this moment of time and also at the webinar. I also reminded myself that I had on several occasions delivered training till 10:30 pm and taken a red-eye flight thereafter to deliver another training at 9 am, the following day, without a wink of sleep.

I made myself a cup of coffee and settled back into what had to be done.

I woke up this morning and I was fully present and had no issues concentrating and being an active participant.

Our state of #mind dictates who we are at any moment in #time. #EI #stress #health #leadfromwithin

Click To Tweet

.

As a leader,

→How do you show up when things happen against your will or expectation?

→How do you react when you are feeling overwhelmed at the number of things that need to be done?

→What are some of the things you consciously let go of to keep yourself at peace and appear calm in front of your team?

→We are emotional beings and the strongest of us go through moments of overwhelm, frustration, and stress. Do you apply the brakes before it is too late to consciously get out of the agitated state of mind leading to stress and frustration?

What are some of the ways to control our mind and be present

1. Be aware

Self-awareness is the first step. You consciously recognize you are in that agitated state of mind. Before your mind takes control of you, take a step to come back into the present. Be aware of your thoughts and feelings and what they are doing to you and your actions.

2. How strong are you?

Encourage yourself by reflecting on how well you did in a similar circumstance. How did you get over the perceived challenge or your state of mind. 

Visualize #positive images to generate positive feelings and calm your thoughts. #leadfromwithin

Click To Tweet

3. Acknowledge

Never ignore your emotions. Be aware, acknowledge and find ways to get over it. For me, taking a walk, engaging in meaningful conversations (with myself or others) to foster understanding or even venting out to a friend or my family helps. Take steps to generate optimism.

4. What can you do?

Everything that happens to us or with us is not within our control. However, the way we show up is within our control. EI can be achieved by any of the above methods and by deep breathing. Deep breathing is difficult when your mind is agitated and it takes a conscious effort on your part to do so. Once you start that deep breathing, you essentially are able to control your Amygdala hijack and thus think rationally.

I have four more Wednesdays when my day will start as early as 3:30 am and I have told myself no matter how my previous day is, I will be present and enjoy the two-hour session and not stress about it before.

How are you controlling your mind?
What are some of the ways you try to calm your mind in moments of overwhelm and stress?

Until, we control our mind that which is within our self, our #perception of our external world will merely be a #reflection of it.

Click To Tweet

A key question you can ask of yourself is, why am I doing what I am doing ?

For one-on-one coaching, speaking, training and/or workshops let’s connect.

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Attitude, Coaching, Communication, Habits, Health, Lead By Example, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life, Mindfulness Tagged With: deep-breathing, EI, emotions, Leadership, leadfromwithin, Mind, optimism, stress

The Vulnerability In Relationships

18 February 2014 By Lalita Raman 5 Comments

I was watching some Ted Talk Videos over the weekend and one of them was on The Power Of Vulnerability. 
This got me thinking about relationships. Relationships are made or marred many times on vulnerability.
There have been numerous cases of abuse, bullying, domestic violence and all this is evidence of putting someone in a vulnerable state or taking advantage of them.
Yet, at other times when we are in a crisis, may be stranded on account of bad weather conditions or losing a job in a close down or merger situation, some of the best relationships are formed during such situations. “Vulnerability is the core, the heart, the center, of meaningful human experiences according to Brené Brown in her book How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead.
Vulnerability here does not mean being submissive or weak. It involves uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure which is well articulated by Brené Browne in her book.
When we see read or hear stories, see videos, hear presentations or empathize with the events in our daily life it is the vulnerability and authenticity which enables us to make that connection. Connection which is an important part of relationships is what gives meaning and purpose to our daily life.
Relationship is about:
1.Respect – you can shine your light but it is not necessary to knock down someone else or dim another’s light. Even if the relationship is not something that you favor, respect is an important element. Respect yourself enough to avoid being taken advantage of. Surround yourself with positivity and compassion for yourself and others.
2.Empathy – the ability to mutually experience the thoughts, emotions, and direct experience of others is an important element in any relationship.
3.Love – the most profound emotion that is an essential part of any relationship.
4.Appreciation – in the world we live today, we forget to appreciate ourselves, our relationships and the moments of life. Appreciation is unconditional and does not contain words like “But”, “However”.
5.Trust – establishing rapport is the start of good relationships. Trust is the pillar of any relationship be it with spouse, parents, siblings, shop keeper, colleagues.
6.Integrity – To me it is the Congruence of I Believe, I Value, I Think, I Feel, I Say, I Do.
7.Obedience – is a matter of the heart. It is about what you feel from within and to be accountable and responsible in a relationship.
8.Nurture – to do and be all that is necessary to grow and enrich the relationship.
9.Space – the little space we allow and create in each of our relationships, be it a friend, spouse, sister, brother or parents, keeps it healthy and allows the relationship to nurture and grow.
10.Honesty – truthfulness, sincerity and frankness in who you are.
11.Interesting – compassion and appreciation for ourselves and others keeps the relationship interesting. Compassion is born of awareness of the choices we are making and the impact of each of these actions on others.
12.Power of Communication – know when to be silent and when to speak up. Not communicating breaks the best of relationships. Conflicts, differences of opinions arise in every relationship. The intent is to disagree agreeably and keep the relationship healthy.  Listening is important to build relationships, because that is where you show empathy and that you truly care.
13.Support – strength in a relationship lies in the support you give to that relationship and that you receive. The ebb and flow of relationship requires mental toughness and support.
Relationship is not about opportunities and using it for those opportunities. Relationships to me means someone with whom you can share your completeness, be it a friend, a life partner, sister, brother, mother or father. A relationship should be one that recognizes you for what you are, challenges you, and allows you to grow.
Let your relationships be one in which you
 
Let yourselves be seen
Practice gratitude and be joyful
Love with your hearts
Are kind and compassionate to yourselves and others
Your willingness to be vulnerable and accept vulnerability establishes and maintains the connection and the authenticity in relationships.
What are some of the ways you have been courageous to be vulnerable and made a connection?
For Individual or Group Coaching, Speaking, Workshops and or Training please connect with Me
image source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Character, Coaching, Communication, Emotions, Habits, Integrity, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life, Relationships Tagged With: Appreciation, behavior, Commitment, Communication, courage, emotions, Empathy, Human, humility, integrity, leadfromwithin, Love, respect, Ted Talks, The Power of Vulnerabillity

On This Father’s Day, a small note of “Thank you”

16 June 2013 By Lalita Raman 4 Comments

Lalita Raman

Lalita Raman

I’ve had the great fortune of growing up with a friend, a mentor who is none else than my Dad. My dad is special to me and my appreciation of him has grown over the years. There is not a moment, I hesitate to share what I have to say with my dad and I think this has been possible only because of the space he has always given in our relationship.

He has always lived his values of integrity, discipline, hard work, empathy and love. He has always encouraged my sister and I to be independent, follow our dreams and to believe in ourself.

Life lessons I have learnt from my dad

1.You are your word and always honor your word.
2.If in doubt, ask questions. Communicate and clarify even in situations of conflict.
3.No matter how bad the situation may be, there is a learning from each of those.
4.Treat people with respect and love.
5.Learn, unlearn, relearn and share.
6.Your inner conscience is your guide and to take the journey within is something I have learnt from my parents.
7.Emotions is an essential part of my life and I need to be emotionally aware and express myself.
8. I have grown up in an environment of healthy discussions, debates and analysis be it of books, movies, TV shows or an incident in our daily lives.
9. Family is very important and always make time for your family.
10. Never be in debt and never borrow.
11. I have the power of choice and I have to face the music of my choices.
12. To live within my means and that my behavior and actions needs to reflect my values.
13. To be ambitious but in chasing my dreams and passion, I should not forget to be gratuitous.
14. To be confident of myself, proud of my achievements but never to un-friend humility.
15. To derive strength in every challenge that I face in life and to be an optimist.

My dad has always loved, cared and looked out for me. He has always understood me, listened, empathized and no amount of words will ever be able to articulate the wonderful Dad that I have.

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life Tagged With: conscience, Dad, dreams. Passion, emotions, family, Father's Day, Gratuitous, integrity, lead from within, life, thank you, Values.

Top 5 Leadership Lessons From YOGA

23 May 2013 By Lalita Raman 2 Comments

Lalita Raman

 

Are you wondering what yoga has to do with leadership?

I have done yoga for almost 10 years and I still continue to learn not only the yoga poses but what yoga can teach about myself, life and leadership. When I started yoga 10 years back, it was purely as an exercise and to improve my flexibility. Most of the yoga instructors will tell you that yoga is a connection between mind, body and soul and the common link is through your breath. I used to hear this but never quite understood the real essence.
My journey with yoga in the first two-three years, was one of hate and love. However, where I stand today with yoga is one of love, where I have learnt to overcome some of my frustrations of inflexibility. This is where yoga is like leadership, in that a leader doesn’t take credit only when the going is good but stands through tough times and journeys through them.

For the full post please click on the LINK

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Coaching, Emotions, Habits, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life, Uncategorized Tagged With: emotions, humility, lead from within, Leadership, Leadership Coach, patience, transitions coach, Yoga

Have You Befriended “The Gremlin”

25 February 2013 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

Belonging starts with self-acceptance … Believing that you’re enough is what gives you the courage to be authentic. – Brene Brown, research professor in social work

Who do you give more airtime to; your “Inner Champion” or your “Inner Critic”

A client of mine, let’s call her Jane had this struggle with her inner village. A pompous voice that always kept telling her that she will fail miserably when speaking in front of crowds.

If you look at Jane, she is an individual who exudes confidence in whatever she does in her other aspects of life. She has ventured out into many challenges in her work and personal life. However, in whatever she does she feels she is an underachiever and she can do better. She expects herself to always do better.

As far as public speaking was concerned, her inner critic dominated her and controlled her actions to her detriment.

As we engage with the world, many times we internalize the voices of our significant others, voices that encourage, voices that criticize, empowering voices, supportive voices, cautious voices, loving voices. And there is our voice of our own inner village that encourages and champions us in our endeavors and other times criticizes us and undermines our potential. The voice of the inner critique is one that loves to break us, stroke us and doubt ourselves. She falsifies your ego by justifying why you don’t want to do something.

When I asked Jane how long she has dealt with her critical inner village, she said “12 years.” And she was giving attention to it for 12 years.

She mentioned that her inner village always liked to bully her, tease her, remind her of all things that could go wrong if she had to speak in front of a crowd, how bad she was when she spoke, how her body language, facial expressions, and the way she spoke was improper. This inner village was almost always with her and spoke to her loud to discourage her. When she was dominated by her inner critic, if she happened to hear anything from her personal relationships, she found herself further vulnerable and in a flight or fight mode, though she never displayed it.

She came to me at a time when she realized that a strategy of trying to shut herself from this voice of the inner critic didn’t work. She realized that the situation was becoming worse. She couldn’t run away from herself. She had to face her inner demons, deal with them and overcome them.

So how does one recognize their inner critic, accept it, learn to deal with it and move on with life without this demon stopping you from living your life.

Questions you need to ask yourself – READ ON... FOR FULL POST PLEASE CLICK LINK

image source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Coaching, Emotions, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Life Tagged With: coaching, Critic, demon, emotions, Leadership, leadfromwithin, negative, The Gremlin, The Inner Village

5 Steps To Overcome Self-Limiting Beliefs

10 June 2012 By Lalita Raman Leave a Comment

Did you know that our self-limiting beliefs are one of the worst obstacles to moving forward in whatever we seek to achieve.  Self limiting belief is that inner thought in our head of doubting oneself and not trusting ourselves.

What are some of these self-limiting beliefs that sabotage our career, our development and our life

Could it be

  • I’m no good at public speaking
  • I’m no good at keeping time

We allow our negative thoughts and frustrations to deter our ability to adapt, to learn, to unlearn, relearn, and to try out new challenges.  The motivation to change has to come from within.  How does one do this?

For the 5 Steps to Overcome Self Limiting Beliefs please click on Link

Coaching can help you reinvent yourself, discover possibilities, and break through to confidence and maintain the new you.

Image Source

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email

Like this:

Like Loading...

Filed Under: Leadership & Personal Development Tagged With: Coaching. leadership, doubts, emotions, lead by example, lead from within, negative, positive, self limiting beliefs

Next Page »

Recent Posts

  • A Tribute to a Courageous and Strong Woman….My Mother.
  • 6 Fences To Build For Yourself
  • Little Things That Matter In Life.
  • 6 Antidotes To Apathy
  • What Does It Take To “Lead By Example”?

Subscribe to my Blog

Co-Author of An Inspiring Book

Transitions, Lalita Raman

Buy Now

Transitions, Lalita Raman

VISIT MY WEBSITE

Categories

  • Animals
  • Attitude
  • Brand You
  • Character
  • Coaching
  • Communication
  • Culture
  • Customer Service and Sales
  • Discrimination
  • Emotions
  • Employee Engagement
  • Energise Your Leadership
  • Energize Your Leadership
  • Entrepreneur
  • Environment and Nature
  • Generalizations
  • Habits
  • Health
  • Hike
  • Idiosyncracies
  • India
  • Integrity
  • Lead By Example
  • Lead From Within
  • Leadership & Personal Development
  • Life
  • Meditation
  • Mindfulness
  • Mobile Phone
  • My favorite songs
  • Pakistan
  • Relationships
  • Resilience
  • Sales Leadership
  • self-awareness
  • Social Media
  • Songs
  • Speech
  • Talent And Human Resources
  • Travel
  • Treks
  • Uncategorized
  • Video
  • Video Blogs
  • Violence Against Women
  • Woman
  • Women
  • Youth

Tags

Anger Appreciation attitude behavior Business Change coaching Commitment Communication courage EI emotions Empathy fear Gratitude Health hope Human humility India judgement lead by example Leader Leadership leadfromwithin lead from within life listen Listening Love mindfulness Nature negativity Pema Chodron positive Questions respect Self-Awareness smile Social Media thank you Twitter Values. Women You Matter

Follow me on Twitter

My Tweets

Archives

  • February 2020
  • January 2017
  • November 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • September 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010

[footer_backtotop]

Copyright © 2007–2025 Lalita Raman, Transitions Intl Limited

%d