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“Be My Valentine – 1 Billion Rising”

14 February 2013 By Lalita Raman 1 Comment

As I’m writing this in the wee hours of the morning, before the crack of dawn, Valentine’s Day is slowly but surely rolling out.

The Valentine Day fever or retail mania has started off a week to 10 days back even in the non Western world. From India, Pakistan, Hong Kong, China and various nook and corners of Asia, it is almost impossible to miss the fervor of this special day.

What is Valentine’s Day ? I won’t bore you with details but for the curios mind, you can check the link.

The significance from what I have read and understood is that it marks the Feast day of Saint Valentine; the celebration of Love and affection.

In my view, love and affection can be to your mother, wife, girl friend, boy friend, spouse, friend, brother, sister, father, child or for that matter to any human being.

I’ve never been a big fan of Valentine’s Day because the true meaning has been lost over the years in the way it is commercialized and has in my view become one of the biggest money-making business. One loses their peace of mind with advance restaurant bookings, retailers wooing you with the Valentine’s Day clichés, set menus in restaurants with no choice left to you to choose what you desire to eat.

On this Valentine’s Day and going forward ask yourself 

  • Is this all that Love and Affection is about ?
  • Are you further victimizing a woman who has already been sexually assaulted by your attitude and lewd comments ?
  • Do you find power in degrading a woman mentally and physically ?
  • Are you not ostracizing woman when you make statements to the effect that woman walk in perpetual consent when they dress the way they want?
  • Are you not being an oppressor watching a rape or sexual assault silently ?
  • Are you not contributing to violence against woman when you watch TV shows and movies that show woman as a commodity ?
  • Are you not being a sexist when you engage in verbal sexual assaults or silently watch the same against a woman ?
  • Are you not bringing disdain to love and affection when you decide to abort a child when you determine the sex of the child is female ?
  • Are you not aiding and abetting with the oppressors when you don’t raise your voice against Female Genital Mutation, sexual abuse or harassment or female feticide or any other form of violence against women. 
  • For anyone who thinks women should ignore online harassment, and not react, would you do so?  Would you ignore it if you are abused, and threatened on-line ?
  • Why do you as society victimize a female and view her with a cacophony of distrust ?
  • Are you treating the woman in your life with love, affection, respect and care? 
  • Are you being human while dealing with a woman ?

Key Highlights from onebillionrising.org. Watch the Video  http://t.co/uK97Qnko.

“ONE IN THREE WOMEN ON THE PLANET WILL BE RAPED OR BEATEN IN HER LIFETIME.

ONE BILLION WOMEN VIOLATED IS AN ATROCITY

ONE BILLION WOMEN DANCING IS A REVOLUTION

On V-Day’s 15th Anniversary, 14 February 2013, we are inviting ONE BILLION women and those who love them to WALK OUT, DANCE, RISE UP, and DEMAND an end to this violence. ONE BILLION RISING will move the earth, activating women and men across every country. V-Day wants the world to see our collective strength, our numbers, our solidarity across borders.

What does ONE BILLION look like? On 14 February 2013, it will look like a REVOLUTION.

ONE BILLION RISING IS:

A global strike

An invitation to dance

A call to men and women to refuse to participate in the status quo until rape and rape culture ends

An act of solidarity, demonstrating to women the commonality of their struggles and their power in numbers

A refusal to accept violence against women and girls as a given

A new time and a new way of being.”

Change starts with you, with your family. If you change your mindsets and attitudes, and every member of your family did the same, this world will no longer have woman who are treated as a Sexual Commodity to be harassed, tortured, raped, humiliated or killed. 

Start now, start today. Speak up, spread the good word of Be A Human and a Woman is Human. Raise your voice as a human being and bring Violence Against Women to an END. 

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Filed Under: Violence Against Women, Woman, Women Tagged With: 1BillionRising, Hong Kong, India, leadfromwithin, Love, Pakistan, Rape, Revolution, Saint Valentine, Valentine Day, Violence Against Women, Violence and Abuse, Women

Titles Don’t Matter-10 Keys To “Good For Soul”

13 February 2013 By Lalita Raman 2 Comments

“The simple act of paying positive attention to people has a great deal to do with productivity” Tom Peters

Have you met Jerry ?

1. I’m always right. I don’t care what it takes or how much work it is. This is the way I see it and no matter what, make it happen in the next hour.Have you met Jerry?

2. Your behavior at or outside work or in Social media is one of “A Narcissist”.

3. You think you know it all and never have an open mind to learn.

4. You’ve decided with senior management that your team targets are going to increase by 30% and promised to over deliver. You have not bothered to consult your team?

5. You think you never make mistakes and don’t ever bother asking others how are you?

6. You are good at striking conversations with strangers but every relationship is one to hook, use and trash.

7. You are convinced that you are the most intellectual and anyone who challenges your line of thinking is made to shut up. You alienate whoever questions you.

8. You think you are reminding people of their accountability and responsibility when all you do is to humiliate them with your sarcasm.

9. You are part of the system and you have never made any effort to be different or change and yet you criticize all, day in day out.

10. You think you are unique and God’s gift to the Universe, though all you are is a jerk. You think none of the above applies to you.

How many of you have had this individual either at your work place or among your acquaintances? 

How many times do people in influential positions misuse the same by bullying and belittling either their team and their social circle ? 

How many people just because of the position they are in think they can demand respect ? 

Whilst there is nothing wrong in being direct and honest, by no means the delivery of the statements or the tone in which it is delivered needs to be rude or sarcastic. People skills is one about being able to connect, engage and treat others with respect and empathy.

What are the keys to People Skills?

1. Be a friend before expecting others to be friendly

2. That either we control our attitude or it controls us. Choose the right one

3. We are a result of our choices and we need to deal with the choices we have made. Negativity and emotional trauma arises when we get into the blaming game for all our misfortunes

4. We do get angry, recognize it, overcome it and do not use anger to be cruel

5. We need to value ourselves and should not allow ourselves to be trampled on. But valuing yourself doesn’t mean insulting others

6. Each of us have our own strengths and we should build and use them to lead with integrity, trust and character

7. Each of us have our own weaknesses and we should marginalize our limitations to move forward

8. That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel

9. We are human and love to be acknowledged, encouraged and appreciated. Being an introvert or shy is no excuse for not telling someone ‘You Matter’

10. None of us are perfect and can teach and learn something each day

Each of us have our purpose. Just because you are the boss, you have no right to stomp on others feelings and values. As far as people like Jerry are concerned one can attempt to unlock the barriers of communication that may exist or be a friend to listen.

Titles don’t determine your value. In the end, you need to remember just because you think you are successful, you have no right to put out someone else’s light and efforts.

Life is a journey of roller coasters and challenges you to be the best YOU can be. Each challenge, be it big or small, is an opportunity for you to make the choice to shift your perspective and view it through the eyes of positivity and hope.

Character is higher than intellect. A great soul will be strong to live as well as think. Ralph Waldo Emerson 

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Filed Under: Coaching, Communication, Integrity, Lead From Within, Leadership & Personal Development, Sales Leadership Tagged With: God, mistakes, Narcissism, Narcissistic personality disorder, People skills, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Social Media, Tom Peters, Violence and Abuse, You Matter

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